• Mark My Words

An Iranian Nuke Maker is Dead but Definitely Not at the Hands of Israelis


Israeli special forces keeping to themselves

In dark and troubled times, I like to share a little light-hearted satire to put a sparkle in your eye and a spring in your step. So, in that spirit, let’s have a chuckle about the Iranian nuclear scientist who was assassinated by a 62-man hit squad who are definitely not Israelis, but just happened to be able to do a perfect imitation of the Netflix show “Fauda”, while bumping off the head of a nuclear program designed to blow Israel off the face of the earth.


Now, some of you might say, “Oh Mark, you zany lost soul! How can you not only laugh at the death of a fellow human being, but laugh until your stomach hurts and tears stream down your cheeks while you stamp your feet on the floor trying to gain control of yourself. Didn't Jesus say we should love our enemies?”


“Well”, I reply, “Yes, he did but the definitely not Israelis don't believe in Jesus, which is a good reason not to threaten to blow them off the face of the Earth if you don't want 62 of the definitely not Israelis to show up outside your peaceful convoy and empty their definitely not Uzis into your face. They never read the memo from Jesus nor did they even ask to be on the distribution.” Personally, I always greet the definitely not Israelis with a friendly smile, just to stay on the safe side.

I do not just laugh at the demise of this would-be nuclear terrorist whose unpronounceable last name begins with “Fak”. Perhaps, we can refer to him as “Fakhead” or “Fakface” or “Fak you, you've just been killed by a definitely not Israeli hit squad!”


I also laugh at the leftists who are lamenting this grand event. For example, former CIA mole John Brennan condemned the not Israeli engineered hit as “An act of state-sponsored terrorism and a flagrant violation of international law”. Many people heard that and asked, “Why is that John Brennan guy always siding with America's enemies?” It is a tough question and I reply, “Why does Dracula always side with vampires?” or “Why do journalists always side with idiots and other Democrats?” or “What is not funny about an Iranian nuke maker assassinated by definitely not Israelis?”


Life is full of mysteries…

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